Working online

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Once he had regained his calm, he realized both his own desires and the fact that he abandoned them all without being able to fulfill them and he forcefully scratched his crimson dyed hair.

"And with this I'm also a complete pariah, huh? Well, that's fine. It just means I'll be going back to how it was like in middle school for me".

"..........".

Listening to those words from Sudou-kun, I fell silent. Now then, I wonder if all my preaching will reach his heart. I was argued down by Ayanokouji-kun, lost to Ryuuen-kun and my brother abandoned me too.

I felt I had no right to reprimand him.

It's because someone I had seen as being beneath my level all this time, now seemed to not be so anymore. Certainly, Sudou-kun is clumsy and is the type of person to not think ahead.

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He possesses an uncontrollable disposition.

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However---by changing perspectives, I could also begin to see him as someone who continued fighting all alone while confronting that loneliness. He who possessed the courage to confront that solitude may yet be far superior to me.

While feeling anxiety that my words won't reach him, I sincerely tried to squeeze out those words. I continued the conversation that was never my forte.

".....it's strange. These feelings of yours are basically the same as my own".

"Ahh? What do you mean?".

"The desire to be respected by someone. The desire to continue fighting on your own. I'm the same".

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He and I are similar. In the sense that we both carry a certain contradiction yet continue fighting against that solitude.

"Thinking back, the signs were there. Back during the midterm exams, I felt irritation towards the students who could not study, including you. I felt angry at people who couldn't even do what's natural. I just couldn't muster up the desire to cooperate with you. Compared to that, you did brilliantly in this sports festival. Because at the very least, you carried the ones who could not handle sports".

Studies and sports. Even if they happened to be the antithesis of the other, in theory they may pretty much be the same. What I had felt towards Sudou-kun and the others in those days, Sudou-kun is strongly feeling that now.